Newly Updated May 16, 2016.
To resist the frigidity of old age, one must combine the body, the mind, and the heart. And to keep these in parallel vigor one must exercise, study, and love. -Alan Bleasdale
Frigidity. Most who suffer with Frigidity feel they are suffering with more than just a physical problem. And many feel there is no hope for them in saving their relationships with their partners, or feeling good again about themselves. But some have figured out a way to overcome Frigidity to enjoy a loving, lush, intimate, and sensual life again.
What is Frigidity? According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary it means: the quality or state of being frigid; specifically : marked or abnormal sexual indifference especially in a Woman. Note: it can also be indifference in a Man. “Because of the derogatory connotations that have become associated with the term frigidity, it has been replaced in the vocabulary of sex therapists by the general term hypogyneismus, the inability of a woman to obtain sexual satisfaction under otherwise appropriate circumstances.
I have come across this issue with patients and clients time and again in my 20+ years in practice. It is something that I find is one of the root concerns in those who suffer with reproductive system health problems.
Frigidity in Women: Unfortunately many times these women are referred to as ‘cold and distant’. Frigidity in women is marked by painful intercourse usually due to vaginal dryness, and/or fear rooted in sexual trauma (possibly rape, molestation, or any other sexual episode in the woman’s life that brings her discomfort if she has not overcome her trauma and those specific thoughts enter her mind when trying to be intimate). First, with the concern of vaginal dryness, it is recommended improving lubrication internally and improving skin and muscle tone.
Frigidity in Men: According to The New Yorker issue, September 28, 1929, article ‘Frigidity In Men’, it is described as “… a man who does not respond to any of the general advances made by the aggressive female. This type of man possesses a recessive knee and also is reticient about kissing. He shrinks from any demonstration of affection, and is considered a biological “sport”. He would rather admire his women from afar and dream about them.” This term of Frigidity is mostly used for women, while today it is referred to generally as impotence in men.
According to Psychology Today, ‘… frigidity in women and impotence in men,… have now been replaced with less judgmental terms. Impotence is now known as erectile dysfunction, and frigidity is now described as any of several specific problems with desire, arousal, or anxiety. For both men and women, these conditions may appear as an aversion to, and avoidance of, sexual contact with a partner. In men, there may be partial or complete failure to attain or maintain an erection, or a lack of sexual excitement and pleasure in sexual activity. In women, there may be an inability to lubricate enough to complete the sex act’.
***Please note I feel both descriptions of a Frigid Woman (as in when she is referred to as ‘cold and distant’), and a Frigid Man are negative and derogatory. As Medical Online’s Sex Therapy states, “Both men and women need the right conditions to respond, and often do not get them.” The right conditions to respond sexually, that is. Best, I feel, let us look deeper into the emotional and physical healing that must take place for these people dealing with this sexual problem so they may feel the capacity to have sexual intimacy again.
Fear to have sex, in both men and women, because of some physical or emotional trauma has been marked as one of the major causes of Frigidity. This Fear is considered emotional pain. And this Fear may also bring on depression. If in turn a person is taking anti-depressants or other medications to stabilize mood, that person’s libido is almost guaranteed to suffer. If they feel they cannot be pleased or feel they cannot please their partner, it may bring about despair and an even more depressed state, and it becomes a vicious cycle. Depression-related libido problems are resolved when we increase serotonin and also naturally improve libido with herbal aphrodisiacs. TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) teaches us that all the above symptoms in women are due to emotional weakness, physical weakness, weak energy flowing through the body, fear/fright, damp-heat within the body, and that the main organs of focus are the Kidneys.
The Kidneys are in charge of reproduction, growth, and the metabolic balance of water throughout the body. Located in the lumbar region of the body, it is said the loins (hips, groin, lower abdomen, reproductive organs) are the residence of the kidneys, so when the kidneys are ill/diseased, symptoms may occur across the loins. Fear is the emotion associated with the Kidneys. Excessive Fear hurts the Kidneys. Toning, strengthening and reinforcing the Kidneys’ energy, according to TCM will also help a person eliminate deep rooted Fear. Frigidity is more than just not feeling like having sex. As we see here it is rooted in a combination of imbalances that reflect themselves in the emotional and physical.
The recommendations I’ve made below are revitalizers for sexual energy as well as effective natural treatments for the unfortunate and common sexual problem Frigidity I’ve stated in this article. Herbs have a centuries-old reputation for effectiveness in working with the body toward sexual health and enhancement. Use the following combination of therapies for increased circulation, heightened sexual desire, and hormonal balance. (Click on each link for detailed information on each herbal supplement.)
For both Men and Women needing emotional and physical balance, here TCM (Traditional Chinese Medicine) formulas:
CHINESE NEGATIVE YIN PACK
For Women, add to Chinese Negative Yin Pack for increased sexual energy and desire the following two herbal therapies:
X-ACTION FOR WOMEN
For Men, add to Chinese Negative Yin Pack for increased sexual stamina and vitality the following two herbal therapies:
X-ACTION RELOADED FOR MEN
Ladies, if you are concerned about VAGINAL DRYNESS/VAGINAL ATROPHY see my other female health article here.
* Another tip, Ladies And Gentlemen! Remember I’ve also shared times before in my posts that studies show an active sex life can make you look up to 7 to 12 years younger, count them, 7 to 12 years younger! “It’s good for you to have good sex,” says David Weeks, a clinical neuropsychologist at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital, whose study on the effects of sex on aging appears in his book, Secrets of the Superyoung. With that said, All Men and Women should consider it a must to get healthy sexually! Love, Be Well, Happy, Young, Healthy, Abundant, and Vibrant!
If you would like to discuss this and/or other health issues with Dr. Julissa, she is available for in-office appointments (*possibly in your area in one of her offices across the US*), phone consultations, Skype, Face Time, Tango, and Facebook Messenger video consultations. Call 212.923.6366 or 917.580.0898 for scheduling. If needed, please leave a detailed message and a staff member will get in touch with you shortly. We look forward to being a part of your optimum health journey!